I was on vacation at the Cape during Carol's last week. Ellen kept me informed (although the wireless reception was weak and many calls were dropped). I felt miserably out of the loop; lousy phone service- no internet -etc.
One evening I took a chair and walked to the beach. The temperature had dropped so I had the ocean to myself. I thought about my Godmother Carol and how she loved the Cape...how she loved life, for that matter. She was always a larger than life character to me. Feisty, sexy, strong, loving, and looking for fun. It made me incredibly sad to think of her suffering and losing her battle with f***ing cancer. I was very grateful that Carol was surrounded by her family and friends.
I'm still struggling to process it. How can a spirit that bright be extinguished?
Thanks to all for the blog entries and calls. It helped me feel connected.
Our family is awesome.
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2 comments:
I was hoping to meet you, PhyllisJune. Maybe you will be at the memorial in Maine?
As for your walk on the beach at the Cape - be assured that your Godmother was there with you. It was her favorite place for many years and the ocean was her "meditation" - I have wanted to get over to the coast to do just that - walk on the beach - but got home from Reno last night and have not had the chance. The ocean for me too has therapeutic value and I often go when I feel distressed or in need of a talk with my grandmother. And now I can talk to Carol too.
Your walk on the beach was the perfect thing to do!
Hope to see you in Oct/Nov!
Dolores
oh sweetheart, I know you wanted to be there and WE wanted you there. You weren't out of the loop and we all knew how hard it was not to be there, but we knew you were there in spirit and you were missed terribly.
love you- leslie
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